Aloha goddesses (and gods), 

LOL. That's still hilarious to me. Anyways, hello! I figured I'd take the time to explain what "big bernie" means. At the Mill, you have to fluff up your pillows after you sit on the cushions and such. EVERY time. I guess they have so many people coming in and out that it has to look immaculate at all times so you can't leave your seats unfluffed. Seriously.

Obviously, you wouldn't know this unless someone told you. I told Clarissa maybe a week after she got here and started hysterically laughing because she didn't believe I was telling the truth. I told her to watch everyone else next time at lunch or whatever and then she realized I was serious. I have never seen anyone sit in the living room in the main house at the Mill but Sylvia had said it's not off limits, just not used that often. One day it was just Clarissa and I in the house and I decided to sit in the living room. After SINKING into the most comfortable couch of my life I realized I had to fluff up the couch cushion/pillow. This was the heaviest cushion EVER. Literally I was smacking this pillow so hard trying to make it look decent again. I had lifted the cushion and it said "Big Bernie". Clarissa lost it (literal tears) and was laughing while exclaiming "You're fluffing up the Big Bernie!". Sylvia actually told me that each cushion weighs 40 pounds. WHO WOULD SHIP THAT TO HAWAII?! Actually, I am kind of curious of having one shipped to my eventual apartment when I move out. It was the most comfortable couch I've ever sat on, that's for certain. So long story short, when I say "big bernie" I mean it as anything I want it to be. I could say "I'm chilling with the big bernie" and I would mean Clarissa, or whoever I am with. Or I could say "I hit my big bernie" and I was just chillin' or being a bum. I use it usually when I'm not doing much of anything or just chillin' out the way I would on a big couch. Basically it's the equivalent of "DaKine" here which literally means anything you want it to.

So, I hit my big bernie last night and had a peanut butter mousse-chocolate ganache-whipped cream cake sent straight from Jesus last night.

Now you're in the know.

With warmest aloha,

MJ